IN THIS LESSON
Our relationships with others exist on a spectrum.
It’s important for us to understand what a healthy relationship is first.
Healthy relationships are mutual - all parties are acting with:
Trust
Respect
Equality
Communication
Independence
Mutual choices
Let’s explore each aspect of healthy relationships and what they mean
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Trust in relationships means that you are comfortable around them, knowing they wouldn't intentionally hurt or upset you, and you know they will be honest with you.
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Respect means you accept the other person for who they are, when you are different or don't agree with them. Respect means trust and safety with that person.
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Equality means the same for everyone - holding the same values, standards, and expectations. This is shown through mutual interest in each other's interests, experiences, and opinions.
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Healthy communication is based on respectful tones, appropriate language, compromise, and active listening. This means resolving misunderstandings, and setting realistic expectations.
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In a relationship, you're allowed to enjoy time and space to yourself, as well as making decisions for yourself by yourself.
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Decisions that impact the relationships, should be communicated and agreed upon by everyone involved.
Green Flags
Transparency
Openly sharing important aspects of life, like finances, plans, or challenges, without secrecy
Supportive
Actively cheering on each other’s goals, passions, and achievements without jealousy or insecurity
Reliable
Being there in times of need, whether for emotional support or practical help
Equal Effort
Both partners contribute equally to the relationship, whether emotionally, financially, or in terms of responsibilities.
Shared Decision-Making
Major decisions are made together, with both voices valued and respected.
Mutual Respect
Each person’s opinions, time, and energy are valued equally, without one being prioritized over the other.
No Scorekeeping
Acts of kindness or contributions to the relationship are given freely, without keeping track of who ‘owes’ more.
Healthy relationships include:
Respecting your boundaries
Each person honors the other’s needs and limits, whether emotional, physical, or personal
Emotional intelligence
Both partners provide comfort and reassurance during tough times. There’s no use of guilt, blame, or other tactics to control or undermine each other. Feelings are expressed openly and constructively without bottling up or exploding.
Emotional regulation
Both partners manage their emotions well, staying calm and respectful during conflicts.
Open and honest discussions of difficult topics
Both partners feel comfortable sharing thoughts, feelings, and experiences without fear of judgment or backlash
Following through on apologies
Owning up to errors and working together to resolve issues instead of hiding or deflecting blame.
Consistency
Words and actions align over time, building reliability and trustworthiness
Encouraging independence
Trusting your partner to make decisions and maintain their individuality without constant oversight